70. TODAY I RETURNED TO THE CEMETERY LIKE @BLOG.1 TO PONDER LIFE.

Yeah cemeteries i have always liked. (Please click here for more info about why i like cemteries).

Will the abandoned Rothschild Paris Mansion become a sports centre as i dream (More info@Blog.62 - Please click here)? 
Will the Rothschilds of England take me & my plans seriously knowing i was once Aaron Rothschild, son to Jenny Rothschild (1920-1944) and Emil Rothschild (1902-1945) (More info@Blog.40 - Please click here)?

Will my religion "Universityism" be accepted as a way to live your life (More info@Blog.51 - Please click here)? 
Will nuclear bombs stop being further developed (More info@Blog.64 - Please click here)?
Will voices i hear (More info@Blog.55 - Please click here) ever stop ruining life (too many Blogs entries to list)
Will self harm be a thing of the past (More info@Blog.34 - Please click here)?
Will i enjoy endorphins released whilst at the gym (More info@Blog.46 - Please click here)?

Will i regain my love of life like i had once learnt (More info@Blog.5 - Please click here)?

Will i ever get a break from hearing them non-stop (More info@Blog.3 - Please click here)?
Will Hospital visits like in the past stay in the past (More info@Blog.48 - Please click here)?
Will emergency services need to be called yet again (More info@Blog.7 - Please click here)
and (@Blog. 26 - please click here) and (@plenty more times)
Will my life as Jock Hudson become a mini series (More info@Blog.53 - Please click here)?
Will by dreams ever become reality like they once did (More info@Blog.50 - Please click here)?

Clovelly Cemetery where i like to come and think. (Please click for more info)

HOPEFULLY THE VOICES IN MY HEAD THAT I HEAR AND THE ONES THAT I MIGHT NOT THAT ARE ALREADY DOING WONDERFUL AND GREAT THINGS WILL CONTINUE OR SOMEHOW START BEING ANGELS RATHER THAN (D)EVIL AND ASSIST TRY TO "GIVE LIFE" BY GETTING RID OF CANCERS, PAIN AND SUFFERING AND HELP ALL AS MANY SOULS AS THEY CAN! 

...Will life ever be easy? 
...At least i know life can be fun (More info@Blog.0 - Please click here)? 
...I say "More time in life should be spent on Fun... and clearly less time pondering it!"
...But i gotta say thank you to all those who have taken the time to read my blog. Thank you. 

69. DO YOU BELIEVE IN SIGNS? YES I KNOW I AM A MENTAL CASE, DOCTORS EVEN SAY SO! SCHIZOPHRENIA & PSYCHOSIS?

I live in Oyster Bay & when i went to the post office i notice what had just opened. "A Cafe in Oyster Bay Where I Live Called" (Rise on the Bay - Please click here for more information) and is across the street is all new & with all new wall art. Just like the guy i always had the hots for (Marc Wilcox) has tattooed on his forearm? Plus since then i have stopped their a couple of times and had an ice coffee and they made me an omelet with everything which i liked and their bread has perfect amount of butter for me too. Very nice! Well worth a visit.

The other day driving home, seen a car like the one this bloke drives back in Los Angeles & uses to advertise his business. "He Has a Great Shop Called" N101 (Please click here) that sells all your nutritional supplies! Shame i did not write in the Marketing plan i sent him that i thought would be useful that he team up with AHF as the open more pharmacies & would like to be a full Chemist Store rather than just a shop that gives pharmaceutical drugs. Back when i suggested the idea, the AHF website homepage said "We provide all prescription needs for free" & i would have negotiated to place a banner advertisement at the bottom of homepage saying "For everything else we rely on N101" with a link to his store.

I should have written it better because AHF was always apologizing for having empty shelves & needed someone to do front of store for them, not donate, but set up for them things for customers to buy, additional extras to their prescription needs & then they could act just like a regular chemist. Since he did not take action all AHF Pharmacies, even one in Beverly Hills now, are just frosted glass windows with a counter.... no front of store which is sad really. Imagine now how many N101 sub outlets would exist as i have lost count of how many pharmacies, if you could call them that since no front of store, that have opened across LA & National.

Now sorry back to why I seeing cars like he drives? Well it caught my eye coz these cars are RARE in Australia & not even sold here anymore 
(If you dont believe why please click here).

What do these cars, number plates and music mean? Please read on.

68. REALLY REAL GOOD NEWS AND SAME OLD BAD NEWS!

Best news ever. Results from this weeks tests came back and i am all completely clear from Myocarditis (Please click here for more info) caused by Clozapine treatment (Please click here for more info) although the weight gain from that was significant. 

Thats the good news. Bad news is, although my heart won't now go cactus, as i attempt to work my ass off at the gym, like usual (Please click here for past gym info), tryin to get back into shape since gained a lot of weight from schizophrenia medications (Please click here for more information regarding medications) and the voice of Karl Josef Silberbauer (Please click here for more info) harrasses me to say the least. Thinks I have money he can gain and all my feel good moments that creates a good vibe stimulates him to be even more jealous and more nasty in my head. Trying not to let it bring me down. They are still"Harnessing" or "Obtaining" or "Receiving" my endorphins (Please click here for more information) so i do not get to feel them  either. 

I wanna make my 40's my best years yet. That was my aim for along time. (Please click here for more info on main aim).

Photos taken 7th November 2019 Bondi Junction gym in the change room mirror and then the mirror above the sinks before leaving.

67. I'M READY TO CRACK IT! SPENDING TIME IN THE SUN SHOULD ONLY BRING FUN & HAPPINESS?

Photo taken 1st November 2019

In writing this i am scared everyone with think all i do is complain and frankly there is a-lot of people that have life tougher than me so the last thing i have is an excuse to crack it. 

I am allowed, after Myocarditis (Please click here) to return and workout at the gym & that includes doing weights now, and my results from the hospital regarding my health have been good. Only one more week of follow up tests.

I been extremely luckily to spend the last few days in the sun which have been more than enjoyable to say the least. That's why tonight at the gym... frustrating... grrrrrrr... I couldn't have looked unhappier if i tried? It's a great thing being able to start getting back into shape again but i guess i'm still dealing with the fact that i am stuck hearing voices non stop and no matter what I say & do and whether i like it or not, and everywhere I go including here at the gym.

I really miss being me. I want me back! 😕

Thanks to Foxes (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCf5x_oiTyNRK72ALzmddwUA)