Jock Hudson™

My FULL Story starts - 19/01/2009. Blog Story Post 0. BLOG STARTING POINT - BEST VIEWED ON A PC/LAPTOP as it LOOK LESS SKETCHY! Thank you for viewing.

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Wednesday, 2 April 2025

194. WHAT HAPPENED TO ROWLF THE WONDER DOG? I MISS ROWLF!

What a wonderful dog was Rowlf. Why didn't he feature in the latest Muppet Movie? He was in the original Muppet Movie, he sung to a broken down Kermit the Frog "I Hope Something Better comes along"! He was a great piano player & singer! He even sung about "Pie"!  

Thank you Jim Henson for creating an amazing Dog named Rowlf! 

















Thank you to Dorcm1973 for posting this at Youtube.com. 

Monday, 10 March 2025

193. RE-CYCLE, RE-INVENT, RE-USE 3D ART! ARTWORKS FOR SALE!

What to do with technology like Keyboards & Cables? when no longer used??? I like to say all my artworks use the theory of Recycle, Re-invent & Re-use when in creation. Ideal for a Tech Company or Company that deals with Computers or any Company liking 3D glossy wall art.

Technology CrossHatched. Artworks Piece 1. Please click on Pic to enlarge.
Technology CrossOver. Artworks Piece 2. Please click on Pic to enlarge.
Technology KeySpaces. Artworks Piece 3. Please click on Pic to enlarge.

All three artworks made & signed by Jock Hudson 2025 are available to purchase. Sale price of all three artworks to be negotiated. Please leave comment to show interest.

Photos do not do art justice as HIGH GLOSS, TEXTURED & GLITTER effects! HAPPY TO SHOW IN PERSON!

Artwork Piece "Fans" also for sale.

Wednesday, 26 February 2025

192. DOGS KNOW HOW TO HAVE A FUN TIME! MARDI GRAS THIS WEEKEND, HOPEFULLY THE VOICES IN MY HEAD WILL LET ME HAVE FUN TOO!

If i was a dog (Please click here for Blog Story 94.) then could I have fun?


So how was Mardi Gras? I did my best, "tried to get off my face" (Please click here for Blog Story 168.) because, although it's not for everyone & sober living is best, i knew if i got the effect that i should had then it would be fun. Sadly the voices "harnessed" (Please click here for Blog Story 97.) or as they are now doing robbing me of an increased effect that I produce which made me feel like shit & all i wanted to do was lay down. You would think that since the women in my head gave me an "Episode last week" (Please click here for Blog Story 176.) that being Mardi Gras they should let me have fun. Still like a trooper i managed to get out & have a dance with once voice in my head that was just getting off on a quick rush by calling me an "Asshole" or "Selfish Asshole" or "Cunt" (Please click here for Blog Story 76.) with vengeance & giving me attitude. If i had a dollar for every time someone has said in my head, which they have no permission to enter, a nasty name or a show of disrespectfulness, i'b be a Billionaire 

No fun with a frown on my face? Voices won't stop harassing me, so i went home & slept.  

Happy Mardi Gras 2025

Wednesday, 19 February 2025

191. I AM NOW A LAWYER! YIPEEE! NO LONGER ONLY A SOLICITOR!

Well after doing my "PLT" (Please click here for more information) with UNSW & doing volunteer work as a Solicitor at HALC (HIV & AIDS Legal Centre) & volunteer work at KLC (Kingsford Legal Centre) after starting April 2024 but had to stop in August (Please click here for more information). of that year due to mental health condition so bad it forced me to stop... I have now, after returning to KLC this January & February, I have done enough volunteer work as a Solicitor that means I can also finish with doing my PLT & be admitted to the Bar. 
HUGE THANK YOU TO EVERYONE THAT WORKS AT KLC! 
I CANNOT BEGIN TO TELL YOU HOW AMAZING THEY ALL ARE!

I am no longer just a Solicitor, that cannot represent clients in court. 

I am now a Lawyer!


Just some paperwork & ceremony at the court to be sworn to the Bar is all needed & its official!


Friday, 24 January 2025

FREE LEGAL-WELL-BEING ADVICE/SERVICE!

FREE Legal-Well-Being advice for LGBTI Community and their friends now available. A Friendly face known as Jock Hudson or under my given name of Alan Dowsett whom holds a Juris Doctor (JD) degree (Law Masters equivalent) from UNSW (Please click here for more information), BA in Marketing from London Metropolitan University and certified in Work-Place Training & Assessment, Public Relations and Diploma in Community services offers a new type of Legal Service.

Please feel free to call/message me (Please click the following Link) with any concerns that your having or to put it bluntly your thinking shit is gonna hit the fan any minute if I am not careful or change what i am doing. 

Basically getting a better understanding of the law and what rights and responsibilities you might have.
Examples of advice you may require:

Wednesday, 15 January 2025

190. DUCK MARATHON - SOMETHING THAT CHEERS ME UP WATCHING - YOU GOTTA WATCH THIS! I LOOOVE THIS!

I love this! 
Where are all these ducks going? 
Do they go running down the middle of suburbia every afternoon?
How do cars drive up the street?
First one to the duck pond wins? 
Please leave in the comments if you know where they are going?

Posting Thanks to Regan Appel. Please subscribe at https://www.youtube.com/@reganappel6271 

Wednesday, 8 January 2025

189. BACK IN HOSPITAL AGAIN!

Not the good start to the year like i was hoping! The voices were “Harnessing” (Please click here for more information) everything again or automated harnessing which I cannot stop plus even worse they were playing a “Game” (Please click here for more information) but a more elevated version with nastiness at its worst. I had no way of sleeping, valium did not do the trick because they were harnessing. How do  I get a break? The new "Medication" (Please click here for more information) should be working but voices have deliberately stayed in my head to try & make it Treatment Resistant Schizophrenia. Anyways I needed a break & consequently i took too many Zyprexa (Olanzapine) Tablets.

Doctors were worried about my heart & irregular heart beats so i got hospitalised Wednesday 8th January. 
Discharged Monday 13th January.

Wednesday, 1 January 2025

188. HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

Photo 2025
Well reflecting on 2024, sad to say but it was a relatively shitty year for me. An "Episode" (Please click here for more information) almost every week, more than a month in "Hospital" (Please click here for more information) plus i never managed to finish my volunteer work to complete my PLT (Professional Legal Training) (Please click here for more information) to go with my "Juris Doctor" (Please click here for more information). Hopefully with the new "Medication" (Please click here for more information) & KLC (Kingsford Legal Centre) is Happy to have me return in January to complete 6 days volunteer work for my PLT then I will be a fully pledged Lawyer. So the start of 2025 should be good. 

Fingers crossed the voices in my head give me a good year!


Happy New Year Everyone! Let 2025 be great!


Saturday, 7 December 2024

187. STILL HAVING PROBLEMS WITH THE WOMEN VOICES IN MY HEAD.

 

Why do i have to have voices in my head??? After being in "Hospital" (Please click here for more information) i have started new "Medication" (Please click here for more information) which initially started well when first taken as it stopped the voices in my head but now??? The "Women" (Please click here for more information) in "Heaven" (Please click here for more information) new i was having an increased dosage injected monthly & when i had the last injection deliberately staying my head because they say i am their cash cow??? At night they place Nicotine Withdrawal on my legs & my back to stop me from sleeping which is so uncomfortable that i overdosed on the Olanzapine trying to deal with what they were doing! If i do not make them feel good they reckon that they have every right to give me an "Episode" (Please click here for more information).  They are selfish as they always "Harness" (Please click here for more information) & arrogant as hell. They know i cannot do anything about them, i have no defence against them. Now go with "Automated Harnessing". Do they not realise how ugly they look doing "Hypnotics" (Please click here for more information) especially when it is because they have unlimited time & nothing better to do??? They need Stimulation???

I do not know them & do not want them in my head. 

They do not have permission to be in my head!!! 

Their Karma (Please click here for more information) is so bad that they can not reincarnate & instead are ceasing in existence! This makes them worse again as they figure they have nothing to loose?

The New Medication (Please click here for more information) should be working but the Women refuse to leave my head!!!

Thursday, 5 December 2024

186. WHAT IS IN A NAME? HOW DID MY TRADEMARKED NAME ORIGINATE?

 How did my name come about? Well originally when i was listed on "Gaydar Commercial Site" (Please click here for more information) I was ...Jock to appear at the top because with 3 full stops i appeared ahead of all those in alphabetical order. I needed a last name. I had met a guy named Brett Hudson who lived in Penrith & drove a Commodore with a body kit & i thought was butch so i thought try the last name "Hudson" I then became Jock Hudson. But then because Jock Hudson rhymes so well with Rock Hudson and it sounded catchy that i liked the name & it stuck. I am sorry but i had completely forgotten or more correctly found it irrelevant that i had used Brett's last name AND RUDELY NEVER EVEN TOLD HIM UNTIL IT WAS TOO LATE. I was already using the name. LUCKILY He & I are still the best of friends. 

Rock Hudson was actually 6'5" (196cm) Tall same height as myself. Except he is brunette whereas i am "Blonde (Tawny)" (Please click here for more information). He was the first famous person to come out of the closet with HIV & sadly AIDS & spent a lot of time in Cedars Sinai Hospital fighting for his life, whereas I spent a lot of time in Cedar Sinai Hospital because of reckless behaviour "Almost ending in death" (Please click here for more information). I had an account with "Cedar Sinai Hospital from frequenting it so much" (Please click here for more information). I only did Safe Sex Films because i wanted to work for AHF (Aids Healthcare Foundation). Thank You to Titan Men & C1R & Falcon Studios/Ragging Stallion for allowing this. 



























Jock Hudson is Rock Hudson on "Opposite/Reverse" (Please click here for more information).

Monday, 11 November 2024

185. THANK YOU TO GOOD SOULS IN MY HEAD. I PICTURE THEM AS FUN MONSTERS! PLUS NEW MEDICATION!

Well today i am actually feeling alot better & do not feel like i am going to have another "Episode" (Please click here for more information). The main reason is not just the new medication which means that i am right protected which means that only voices that have "White Light" (Please click here for more information) around them may enter my head, but also there have been good souls in my head.

I wont & must not forget... Jones. However Jones wanting to be the hero in all of this also made him a problem & had no problems fucking me over half the time but luckily when he was good he was really good (Left hand side & now reincarnated as cunted himself rather than me in the end! (Left side Grumpy Monster). 

Ralph (Seen below as Blue Monster) i definitely have love for since he has protected me like being told by "High Frequency Orb" (Please click here for more information) back in 2013 for as long as i can remember now, for almost a century! He cannot/won't reincarnate until my life is restored & Cleo (I get her & Chloe, another good soul, mixed up names wise so gave nickname Vitamin C but with Ralph I nicknamed "Multivitamin" (Monster with Oranges) Also Sue (thinks numerically & laughed at how i do maths so nicknamed Miss Accountant - Monster second from left top row) & Brent (Monster left to Ralph Blue Monster & beside Sue Monster), Then there is Bob (Mr. Bloggier placed/engraved my Blog Story Posts to stop problems for me (Please click here for more information) since i no longer had them on a screen 24/7 - One eyed happy Monster top row). Foxy Loxy/Mr. Lawyer... 

There are plenty more good little monsters (Souls) that definitely need a Thank You that have not been named or mentioned but have been helping me overcome the nasty voices that just want to do evil "Hypnotics" (Please click here for more information) because they have unlimited time & nothing better to do which means i have no life? I hope things continues to go well & i can become myself again & then there will be no "Consequences" (lease click here for more information) to "Heaven" (Please click here for more information). Chloe like others have said that they do not need a Thank you because they know the right thing to do & want to escape the consequences. 

Thank you to Dreamtime.com & Monsters, Inc for the Monsters


Thank you helpful Monsters (Souls in my head that are not disrespectful). 
I am starting to feel like myself again after more than a century of abuse! 

Thank you to Dreamtime.com for the monsters.


The New Medication (Please click here for more information) is working! Thank you!

What now? Please read on.

Sunday, 20 October 2024

184. PLEASE WISH ME LUCK?

I am writing this still being in "Hospital" (Please click here for more information) & not sure how i am doing? The voices in my head seem to be settled thanks to some good souls in my head that have set them straight & taken affirmative action. Not sure where i am with the "Wall Psych Question" (Please click here for more information) but i am doing alot better than i was last Wednesday when i was admitted. My fear is when & if they allow me to leave Hospital will the voices go back to giving me "Episodes" (Please click here for more information). I almost had an episode last night in hospital but luckily good souls and Present (Please click here for more information) won’t have it! 

Please wish me Luck? I cannot handle more Episodes (Please click here for more information).

Saturday, 19 October 2024

183. HOSPIALISED AGAIN? POLICE & PARAMEDICS KINDLY TAKE JOCK HUDSON TO HOSPITAL!

Hospital Care (ICU - Intensive Care Unit) since Wednesday 16th October.

What am I meant to do when the voices i hear in my head go too far in messing up my live & causing me grief? Sadly last Tuesday night the voices were at their worse & giving me a major "Episode" (Please click here for more information) Very similar to last time "Hospitalisation Occurred" (Please click here for more information). One of the female voices i heard kept saying she hated my guts because i had pointed out how she could feel good 100% & remain with "White Light" (Please click here for more information) & as she said "The men would still be interested in me". Oooooh she was vial. I could not swallow or drink or eat & the voices felt the were gaining "Jackpot" in their "Game" (Please click here for more information) because it meant if i cannot swallow that i would die of dehydration & starvation! Sad that the "Women" (Please click here for more information) get off on harming me & get together in groups of 150 Women so that they is basically not much anyone can do about them. Somehow the Women blame me for their problems & why they want to harm me. I am sick of them saying "Your a selfish Asshole/Cunt" when the truth is that these souls have "Unlimited time" & nothing better to do with their time being in "Heaven" (Please click here for more information) & they are the selfish ones as they expect me, whom does not have unlimited time, to make them feel good & therefore get off on doing nothing more than harrass me.  








Police & Paramedics called by a neighbour living on his street discovered how distressed he was & i do not want to admit but unable to deal with the abuse & torture the voices were giving him on Wednesday afternoon Jock Hudson aka Alan Dowsett was found standing on a garbage bin with a noose around his neck. 

Emergency Services included both Police & Paramedics that decided it was best if Jock Hudson was placed in ICU (Intensive Care Unit) Mental Health Ward at Sutherland Hospital. Hopefully the good souls in my head will beat the nasty, rude disrespectful souls that only want to "Cunt" (Please click here for more information) me & i will get my "Life Back" (Please click here for more information).

Hospitalised 16th October.

Release date 8th November with Discharge date of 11th November if New Medication (Please click here for more information) goes well. 

I do need a Break!



Monday, 7 October 2024

182. THE FUN I COULD BE HAVING IF NO VOICES IN MY HEAD?

The voices i hear in my head being "Schizophrenic Diagnosed" (Please click here for more information) are in "Heaven" (Please click here for more information) & majority of them want to treat me badly & give me "Episodes" (Please click here for more information). This October Long Weekend "I Remember House" (Please click here for more information) was held & a friend convinced me to go. I was paranoid that i am out of shape from inability to go to the "Gym" (Please click here for more information) however i did go. Seen a lot of familiar faces & when i arrived the party was absolutely going off! Same generation as me as i do not think getting off your face & dancing is the next generations thing?

Will the Retirement Village be going off? MY TIME IS LIMITED!




















They say that dogs are a good judge of Character???
Would you believe this is not my dog???
I was sitting in the park???

What happened at the Party? Please read on.

Thursday, 3 October 2024

181. COULD HEAVEN CEASE TO EXIST?

If no souls have "White Light" (Please click here for more information) around them "Heaven" ceases to exist?


Are there "Consequences" if i die that also means "Heaven" ceases to exist? (Please click here for more information)


If you have read the "Afterlife Ceases to Exist" (Please click here for more information) & now "Only Heaven" (Please click here for more information) then you know that i am serious. 


Souls in "Heaven" (Please click here for more information) are so involved or as i would say "Fucked Up" in "Hypnotics" (Please click here for more information) & giving themselves additional "Abilities" via "Hypnotical Setup" which they do not need. One woman who insisted on being called "The Madonna" screwed herself & all of "Heaven" because she had given herself abilities which made her have the ability to control everyone & of course treat me like shit but she had not given herself the ability to think rationally & logically & realise that being on "Opposite/Reverse" whilst i am feeling like death is not just bad Karma but also it is the WRONG THING TO DO & WILL CAUSE YOU TO LOOSE WHITE LIGHT AROUND ONESELF. As she recruited more & more souls to increase her evil ways meant that it got to a stage that there was pretty much no one left with "White Light" (Please click here for more information) around them which meant that "Heaven" should have ceased in its existence & disappeared completely? 


So how can Heaven still exist? Please read on.

Friday, 20 September 2024

180. I'D LIKE TO SPREAD MY ASS CHEEKS & GIVE SOME SOULS (VOICES THAT I HEAR IN MY HEAD THAT ARE IN HEAVEN) A VEGEMITE SANDWICH?

Faaaaaark i am so over souls voices that are in "Heaven" (Please click here for more information) i can hear in my head that do not have "White Light" (Please click here for more information) around themself & place "Hypnotics" (Please click here for more information) & "Harness" (Please click here for more information) & do not at least read Blog Story Post 164 "What is The Problem Now" (Please click here for more information) that restores White Light so that they will stop feeling uncomfortable & stop playing Games like "Search & Destroy" (Please click here for more information). They cause me unhappiness, grief, pain, misery depression & an inability to think & have fun so that now in 2024 when i do have fun it makes me cry! How can we overcome, when i die, the "Consequences" (Please click here for more information). I so wish to spread my ass cheeks & give those souls a Vegemite Sandwich!
















So far this year has not been good! How can I make it better?

Wanna find out more about me & all my years as a Schizophrenic? Please read on.

Wednesday, 18 September 2024

179. THE SIMPSONS GO TO AUSCHWITZ? IS ANTI-SEMITISM ON THE RISE AGAIN? IN ITALY? VATICAN CITY? PERHAPS?

The year 2020 marked the "75th Anniversary of the Liberation of Auschwitz" (Please click here for more information) & for all the people that have been drawn to visit Auschwitz "The Atrocities Have Been Hidden" (Please click here for more information). "Alexsandro Palombo in Italy (Milan) February 2015" decided that to remind the younger generations of the "Holocaust" that occured during World War II it would be best to depict "The Simpsons" as being Jewish & having them sent to "Auschwitz" (Please click here for more information). 

Marge, Homer, Bart, Lisa & Maggie wearing yellow stars, in striped Jewish Prisoners garbs & as famished inmates definitely caught everyone's attention.  Not sure how i feel about this but the Artists work aimed at the younger generation & appeared on the Walls of the Memorial of the Shoah in Milan did see someone object as sadly & stupidly they graffitied the Artwork on "January 27th 2023 on The Day of Remembrance" (Please click here for more information) seen below being photographed by an admirer before it was vandalised. Clearly in Italy, Milan, or heck or should i say more likely Rome (Vatican City), however no large Holocaust Memorial exists there, to make it more obvious, "Anti-Semitism" is on the rise again?



Quote from Elie Wiesel (Orphaned Jewish Survivor (Buchenwald Concentration Camp) survivor of Auschwitz). 

"To Forget How They Died, Is To Kill Them All Over Again"

Did i Survive Auschwitz? Please read on.

Wednesday, 11 September 2024

178. A NEW CONCEPT ON WARS?

Vladimir Putin (President of Russia) the man that says that he is selfless by only living on the poverty line with a yearly income of $200,000, but he somehow owns ridiculousness, from a $12Billion Palace in the forest with its own Airport & with 24 Karat Gold Toilets everywhere he visits including on his Helicopters & Jets to owning over 700 sports cars. To see what he owns please click here. 
"What Do They Say About Owning Sports Cars?" INADEQUATE DICK! Why does Vladimir Putin want to take over the Ukraine? Obviously so he can get his hands on more money & spend more. Maybe the $30Billion he spent on war fare he could have given back to the people or allowed them a paid Public Holiday. "Russia is Bigger in Land Size than America but merely consists of Moscow & St Petersburg" (Please click here for more information). 

"Rather Than Soldiers Dying in The Name of War" why can't Volodymyr Zelenskyy (President of Ukraine) next time he has a meeting with Vladimir just get out a knife & simply cut his throat? Hell... Why not??? It is ok for a Russian Soldier to do that to a Ukraine Soldier(s) or Civilian(s)? If Volodymyr wears a soldiers uniform rather than a suit can he execute Vladimir?. 

Imagine if during each War it was just the Leaders of each Country that got into a Boxing Ring & Fought it all out rather than having hundreds & thousands of Innocent Soldiers die in the name of War???

What could Adolf Hitler have done differently? Please read on.

Monday, 26 August 2024

177. FIVE YEARS OF BULLSHIT! HOW CAN I MAKE THEM SEE SENSE OR MAKE REASON WITH THEM?

If you have been reading my blog story then you will know that I blame women voices in my head as being "My Problem" (Please click here for more information). "Karl Josef Silberbauer" (Please click here for more information) was my biggest problem & due to his hatred & jealousy of me why I am schizophrenic and had no life, however, "Equilibrium Occurred" (Please click here for more information) four years ago as he happily went to the core to escape consequences in a way to pass/reincarnate so I should have gotten my life back but no that has not happened. Why? Because a year at least before he passed on he & the whores set up "Hypnotics" (Please click here for more information) that shared his hatred for me & made the women be selfish, sadistic, arrogant & narcissistic, & they have continuously placed this on their heads as having the worst Ora’s possible (level 5) & their power rush stopped them from feeling uncomfortable & gave them stimulation. Basically they treated me like shit & therefore lacked self control to stop themselves from treating me like shit. My only ability is to somehow reason with the thousands of them with this bullshit on their heads but under the influence these Whores are far worse than a soul that did not reach “Optimal” (Please click here for more information) so I have gotten no where & the number of women under the influence has only increased! Why? Because when the women feel uncomfortable they spend their time talking shit about me laced with hypnotics? 

I know what the problem is (Please click here for more information). For five years the Hypnotic Whores (Please click here for more information) have had no ability to do anything but treat me badly & have learnt to get off on treating me badly! They enjoy it!

What else do these whores do? Please read on.

Tuesday, 11 June 2024

176. WHY DO I KEEP HAVING EPISODES? IT IS NOT FAIR!

It seems almost weekly i am having an episode. An episode is when the voices in my head have taken control & i am left screaming my head off. I cannot talk properly, I cannot swallow which means i cannot drink, eat or take anything, & the voices in my head i find so frustrating that i cannot do anything but scream. The worst part about not being able to swallow is that you choke. When i go to take my medications it makes it extremely hard to take. The voices like to play a game "Search & Destroy" (Please click here for more information) but an upgraded version wanting me to self harm (Please click here for more information) or even kill myself which makes no sense. The voices are meant to be in "Heaven" (Please click here for more information) but are seriously selfish & continue to "Harness" (Please click here for more information) my good feelings sensations or now "Automated Harnessing?". All the voices want to do is place "Hypnotics" (Please click here for more information) because they have learnt them & have unlimited time & nothing better to do but always with me on the receiving end. The voices have also started what they call the "Eating Game" although it should be called the "Not Eating Game"

I am sick of having Episodes. How can i stop them? 

For more information & how bad they get? Please read on.

Tuesday, 7 May 2024

175.VOLUNTEER WORK AT KLC (KINGSFORD LEGAL CENTRE) COMMUNITY LEGAL CENTRE!

I am working as a volunteer Solicitor at Kingsford Legal Centre (KLC), the Eastern Suburbs Community Legal Centre. 

After doing my "Graduate Diploma of Professional Legal Training" (Please click here for more information) to go from being a Solicitor to becoming a Lawyer since already having done a "Juris Doctorate" (Please click here for more information) (The equivalent to a Masters in Law except my first BA was in something other than law so it is for Postgraduate Students only).

Sadly the voices think i am a "No Hoper" & made it difficult for me to listen & do phone advice. KLC decided to just get me to do Face to Face advice since i would have better chance of engaging with the persons involved & less chance the voices in my head taking over & making me useless, but no chance, again sadly the voices, mainly "Women in my head" (Please click here for more information) decided that because i was a "No Hoper" that they would enter my head & stop me being able to do that as well. So sadly i have not finished my volunteer work needed to complete my Graduate Diploma of PLT & become a fully fledged Lawyer. I should have already completed PLT & being initiated to the bar via a ceremony at The Downing Court Centre! 

Due to Bad mental health sadly postponed mid August until January 2025 to start KLC volunteering again.

Thankyou to Donna Summer for singing this song at Youtube.com

Wednesday, 17 April 2024

174. WHAT IS GOING ON? I AM GROVER (Thank you to Sesame Street) & PLEASE I WANT MY LIFE BACK!

i do not know what is going on with "Heaven" (Please click here for more information) that i hear in my head. I have been having "Episodes" (Please click here for more information) weekly which is shocking. During those episodes i cannot sleep, i cannot eat, i cannot drink & i even have troubles talking because the voices do not want to hear me talking out loud whereas when i talk in my head they can make it so that they do not hear me. 

The voices i hear reakon they know me, but how can they know me when i have not been myself since 2009 which is when the schizophrenia started. I miss being me. I should sound like a little kid in my head since my soul is only 3•5 years old after dying in my second life as "Aaron Rothschild" (Please click here for more information) & in my first life i only lived until "3•25 years old as Jesus" (Please click here for more information). Supposedly the youngest soul imaginable.

I unintentionally make Grover sounds when i am happy!

"My nickname is Grover" (Please click here for more information to test yourself to see how mental aware you are). Yes i do my best but always seem to stuff things up, plus i unintentionally make Grover sounds all day long if you are listening to me & i am able to talk with the voices in my head. 

The louder i scream "I want my life back" the more the voices in my head treat me like shit. (Please click here for more information).

Please read on.

Friday, 29 March 2024

173. SERIOUSLY WOMEN (Ladies excluded) ARE A PROBLEM IN MY HEAD?


The women voices that i hear in my head are all in "Heaven" (Please click here for more information) & they all know i want to have fun. Whenever i am having fun these women "Harness" (please click here for more information) which means they have fun whilst i sit sad & depressed & they do not care because they have done this for 3-8 years. These women could "Lay Dormant" when i have fun which means i would have fun plus they would have fun plus i would not even know they exist PLUS they would not have to hear or see me whether i talk in my head or talk out loud. These women because they "Harness" & can only do this by being in my head means they place "Hypnotics" (Please click here for more information) on my head to harm my eyes so they do not hear what my brain recalls when i look at things, stop me from thinking so they do not have to hear my thoughts & also make it so i cannot be heard even though they are in my head without my permission all to accommodate themselves. The level of selfishness & arrogance that these women have is beyond understandable. Their only excuse "We are in the afterlife"??? or "We know Hypnotics"???. The women also believe that they have every right to give me an episode (Please click here for more information) & do so on almost a weekly basis becasue they get off on causing me pain. They don't have White Light around themselves & expect me to make them feel good. Why? Because i can, & they are too lazy or riddled with hypnotics (Please click here for more information) to know any better.

If i try & set these women straight & point out they are "Sadistic" they then are twice as sadistic as before. How can i make them stop.  
Women shut up please!


Why are Men not a problem? Please read on.

Saturday, 2 March 2024

172. HAPPY MARDI GRAS 2024!


Happy Mardi Gras 2024 to all those I have love for & I guess those I do not have love for as well! Lol.
I know I am getting old when I have no party tickets after my first party in 1995! 


Well it is Mardi Gras & I should be "Off my Face"(Please click here for more information) but sadly not. Why? Not from lack of trying but because the voices I hear in my head are "Harnessing" (Please click here for more information) which means they are high & feel amazing & I feel absolutely nothing at all. Completely sober which is boring as shit on this night of the year! But then you would think at least on my birthday the voices would give me a break... but sadly no chance then either so I guess my fault for expecting different! Please save up some love for me?